The Human Touch

This weekend on the official day 1 of summer, the mercury hit 100 degrees in our part of the world. We didn't have major plans, but a trip to the mall was due (Macy's had their one day sale...yes yet again!). So we finished our business at Macy's and paid Potterybarn a routine visit (for all the modern cleaned line look R and I prefer, it sometimes amazes me that I can spend so much time at PB!). Anyhoo, we browsed the clearance rack (lest I find some more pure silk drapes in the perfect size), didn't find anything and started to head out the store.

So we're stepping out but there's a lot of people walking right outside the store front (the corridor in between the stores on either side of the mall) and we're waiting to step into a gap.

A young girl/woman is walking by with a man...and she has her hand up as if she's waving to R and I standing right outside the store. I smiled back, R waved and said Hi!

The girl caught R's hand and stopped in her tracks. When she stopped one could tell something was not quite right with the girl, she didn't say anything but she leaned forward to peck R on his cheek. First one, then the other, while the guy she was accompanied by was trying to get her to let go. He seemed somewhat embarrassed, we were both watching this unfold. And that was not quite the end of it. She reached up and hugged R!! And she just would not let go...

She still didn't say anything, not sure if she could or knew how to. But you could tell she was not quite normal (and I hate saying that because she just might be free spirited and might be perfectly normal. Anyway, we don't see strangers doing things like this...so it was definitely out of the ordinary.)

So anyway, her friend finally managed to separate them, all R could do was wait until she was done sharing her affections. At some point I think I was moved to tears (no, not because an unknown girl was hugging my husband and you think I was upset) but more because this was something so simple and basic. The girl probably was happy that someone responded to her gesture and was being as goofy as she was. There was a childlike quality to her and she did what a little child looking for attention would do!

I will never forget her face. She's locked in my memory forever...

It's funny, I'm sure there will be a lot of sneaky comments on this one, but R was super embarrassed after the whole thing. He didn't know how that happened or why and when I told him about this post he was shaking his head in the most disapproving way!

Well honey, I did it anyway because to me it seemed like she was saying thanks for humoring her, for letting her be herself, goofy and silly. Most of all, it was like her saying thanks for not letting the child in you get lost! And that's the one quality I hope you never, ever lose.

Awww... :)

This actually moved me to tears!

Sometimes, I get overwhelmed when I read or hear about an act of honesty or kindness. Like this news item on mumbaimirror - http://mumbaimirror.com/article/2/2009061720090617043914133c09a1ced/Auto-driver-saves-the-day-for-bride-returns-lost-jewellery.html

It's about a family that left behind a bag of jewelry in an auto-rickshaw, en route to the venue for their daughter's wedding. The driver noticed the bag later and rushed back to the venue to hand it over to the much distressed family. We all know what it means for a girl's family to get the daughter married. We all understand the role jewelry has to play in all of this, not just from a dowry perspective but also from the "stree dhan" point of view.

People from rich families would be distressed by something of this sort happening to them, imagine the plight of the less fortunate.

Kudos to the rickshaw driver, may his act of righteousness and goodwill bring hope to jaded souls like mine.

No wonder, reading something like this moves me because although it is the right thing to be done, somewhere inside I am so jaded that I have become a non-believer? HMMM food for thought!

Not so Shiney after all?

I shall be the first to admit - I liked Shiney Ahuja's "on the edge" performances. But his latest fiasco churns my stomach and makes me sick!

It's when the rich and illustrious expose their underbellies, that we get to know the harsh realities that face us. He's supposed to be in custody until June 18 for his heinous crime that he claims was consentual. We'll find out more as the story unfolds, but I am just totally disappointed. Shame on you, Shiney!

Edited to Add: I had opened a new post but never quite wrote it. don't go by the date on this one - I had no clue about this until Sunday night (6/14) when R announced what he read on Mid-day.

When to love is to let go...

Loving and losing are a part of life. There are several famous quotes I could rattle off on the topic and often they seem awfully cliché. Some might even call them philosophical, but when you go through those emotions and come out wiser and older, you know they hold true.

A dear family member has been having a tough time grappling with the changes in his life. After years of being in a relationship, complacency sets in and anything that is different from the “old normal” is abnormal. Me being older (ahem! And wiser…) I had to give him sound advice and put his fears to rest. Having been through some of those emotions myself, the attempt at putting him to ease helped me take a step back and re-evaluate my own experiences.

Many moons ago, R had asked me to read a famous book called “who moved my cheese”. I have seen the book on various bookshelves through my growing years. But it never moved me enough to want to read it. When R recommended it, we were having our own set of issues and I was adamant I wouldn’t read it because I feared it would somehow prove him right.

We moved on and have been happily married for over two years. In retrospect, it all seems so childish. It is freaky how different life is when you’re 23 versus when you’re 27. R’s older brother had once made a comment, “you both have to grow up together…” I keep those words close to my heart. And through the years I have reminded myself that nobody said this was going to be easy.

Growing up is tough, being in love is tough and life is not a bed of roses. You don’t always get what you want and sometimes you have to put ‘us’ before you think about ‘I’. I am not trying to say that life is all serious and no fun. But you have to put things in perspective. Change is the only constant, times change, people change, life changes. To imagine your life will always stay the same is, well…romantic!

And this I find true not only of romantic relationships but when you share a close bond with another person, this is true. When you are closely bound, you have certain expectations. Expectations lead to let downs, let downs lead to heartache. Relationships have to be worked on. Anything that grows, need nurturing and care. Most of all, you need space. Space to grow, space to think.

Being in love is not all about having rose tinted glasses on and saying "I love you" every few hours of the day. The real test of love is in the hardships. It is not how well you do when times are good, it's how you perform when times are bad that matters. Every relationship reaches a stage where the going gets tough. The ones that adapt and press on to make it through, eventually come out stronger. Those that find it too hard to move on and cling on too tightly to the past, often will turn so brittle that they will eventually break under pressure.

It's like that old proverb, when you love someone, let them go. If they love you, they'll come right back?

Things have changed for the better for my family members. And I hope that they understand and are wiser by their own experience that it's important to keep things in perspective and adapt to changes in your life.

So let one of your grudges or peeves go today. You'll come through feeling a lot less burdened by the baggage of your expectations.

my favorite verse...

woh ek khushboo aati thi

woh ek khushboo aati thi..

main bhatakta jaata tha

reshmisi maya thi

aur main takta rehta tha

jab teri galli aaya

sach tabhi nazar aaya

mujhmein hi woh khushboo thi

jis se tune milwaya, aa

maula, maula, maula mere maula

Maula Maula from Delhi 6 - Lyrics: Prasoon Joshi

Ityadi, Ityadi, Ityadi

Etc. Etc. Etc.
There are many names for a vagina. Ever heard of the Vagina Monologues? No, well get the gist of what it is/was at Wikipedia. I was reading Mid-Day and came across this video, a bunch of theatre actors rehearsing for the Marathi adaptation of the original Eve Ensler series at Ravindra Natya Mandir at Prabhadevi, Bombay. I watched it and for all those (girls) of you that understand Marathi, I thought this would be worth sharing. It's actually funny and some of what the women say is actually true :)

We're so accustomed to keeping our privates err...private that we're almost ashamed of referring to them as Vaginas. We all have different names associated with it...pee pee, vajayjay, or worse and more derogatory. But that the center of a woman's being is repressed is an understatement. I hope to catch the broadway series some day. I can't say that I will not burst into girlish giggles when I hear some of the monologues but I am sure it will be as much fun and liberating as a pedicure with girlfriends, or a gossip session on the phone!

Watch and enjoy this rehearsal video if you understand Marathi.

The one in which GG was TOTALLY and UTTERLY Surprised!!

Picture this: GG is at work, they're carpooling today so she's waiting for R to pick her up. It's way past the usual get home hour and she waits while listening to unkind rumbling sounds from the stomach, indicating her blood sugar levels are low and she needs FOOD!!

6.30pm...R calls says he's waiting outside. So she packs up and walks out...R has the car turned, ready to pull out and as she opens the front door she sees a white box in a clear bag occupying her seat in the front.

"What is this?" she asks...annoyed that it's late, she's hungry and now she must move this unsightly box to sit her butt down and go home.

"Happy Birthday!" he says...

"hain?? But it's not my birthday...what is this???"

"Take a look"...he says

So she picks it up, sits down and he starts to drive. She looks at the box where a the picture of a laptop is drawn and it says MACBOOK in large bold letters and her jaw hits the ground!

"Did you win this?" _ R's company has these wild giveaways, and economy notwithstanding she thought this might actually be a windfall!

"No, he says it's your birthday present"

And she's baffled. It's not my bday, what about the new phone, the other gifts? What was that...

"well that was for previous year's"

Low blood sugar obviously doesn't make for a normally bright GG. Reality finally dawned on her that R had meticulously "hid" this development from her. She asked him how he pulled it off?
"How come I didn't know??"

"Because M* went and picked it up..." he says,

"Ah...no wonder! But why did you have to give him the runaround? They're busy with the baby and parents etc..."

"The deal was in that particular store in CA"...he says

"ah, well then I must thank him"

"I think M* picked it up and M** shipped it, so looks like it went through everyone"...

"Ah...then it's time to thank both of them!"

M** was duly called and thanked for having a hand in this fantastic surprise! She sweetly gave the credit to R&M*...the two brothers did most of the work!

OK well...suffice to say that GG sounded like a school girl, giggling and squealing in delight. The timing couldn't have been better...

Our home laptops are kind of obsolete...err one is downright broken, the other is slow and battered and we needed a computer for our pictures, music and other important information. I'd been asking R to buy one, whether it was a Dell/HP I couldn't care less!! So one can imagine the shock value of getting something that is so sweet! My one criteria was that it have all the features and still be somewhat light. So kudos to R, he's been taking in all my feedback, scouting for deals and finally with the help of his partner in crime I get the perfectly timed gift!!

I said my thank yous already...but I think the glee in my voice, the grin on my face and the twinkle in the eye might have been the most gratifying sight for R :-)

Now I need to name it...and I'm thinking of calling it Albus McBook.

R was suggesting species of Apples...my favorite kind are Fuji. But Fuji MacBook sounded weird...

Then I said maybe a Harry Potter inspired name would work...

Nimbus 2009 was a forerunner...

Dumbledore, Penseive...I was thinking of anything with a white attached. And then as I looked at the screen below which it says MacBook I said...this guy already has a last name...so I just need a first name! 

Albus was perfect because Albus is latin for White :)

So, dear reader...Albus will be my new associate in maintaining this space and publishing new posts. Welcome Albus to Gg's gizmo gang!

* - Mo of MnM fame, R's older brother

** - Me of MnM fame, Mo's wife and Aarush's Momma!